Wednesday, December 30, 2009

The Real 2009 Year End List (Not For Pussies)

There were lots of funny things about Tim and Anthony's "Favorite in 2009" Lists, but one of the sadder parts was that they were both written by pussies.

They'll be none of that with my list, friends. If you'd indulge me for a moment, I'd be happy to cut through the bark, trim the fat, skip ahead and get right to the truth of the matter.

And here it is: you'd be hard pressed to find someone that is less of a pussy than I, you're humble and modest listsmythe. My modesty, in fact, is surpassed only by my sheer and utter lack of being a pussy (which I am not* thank you).

So - since you now can be certain beyond the whisper of a shadow of a doubt that you are about to hear the real, pussy-free deal - let's begin.

*Sometimes I agree with pussies.

Best Movie: The Fantastic Mr. Fox

Most Fun I Had Watching a Movie This Year: Star Trek

The Two Best Movies "For Kids" That Aren't Fantastic Mr. Fox: Up, Where The Wild Things Are

Almost Best Album: Grizzly Bear - Veckatimest, Islands - Vapours, Sunset Rubdown - Dragonslayer, Passion Pit - Manners, Antony and the Johnsons - The Crying Light, Mew - No More Stories...

Best Album: Animal Collective - Merriweather Post Pavillion

Best Songs On That Album: My Girls, Summertime Clothes, Bluish

Best Songs by R. Kelly This Year: Number One, Echo, #1 Fan

Best Show on Television:
Mad Men (AMC)

Funniest New Show: Modern Family (ABC)

Best Show Ever: The Wire (HBO)

Best Cartoon: The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack (Cartoon Network)

Still Makes Me Laugh Every Week: The Simpsons, South Park

Consistently Better Than Family Guy: American Dad

Best New Yorker Cover: November 2nd, 2009 (Chris Ware)

Best Vegetable: Spinach

Best Comic: Achewood

Best Live Comedy Group: The Dan Ryan

Best Catchphrase: "I wanna hit that bitch with a shovel!" (Me)

Best Books I Read: Rabbit, Run and Rabbit Redux (John Updike)

Most Exciting Sports Moment: Alex Rodriguez' game tying two-run homer in game 2 of the ALDS

Best Video Game - (Tie) The Beatles: Rock Band, New Super Mario Bros. Wii

The Best Phone: The iPhone (why would you have a different phone?)

Funniest Writer: Gabe at Videogum

Best Cocktail: Vodka and Soda with fresh lime-juice

Best Food Deal: (Tie) Free Pizza with Drink Purchase at Alligator Lounge, Free Sake with Dinner at Sakura

Not Sayin' I Would, But If I Had To: John Hamm
Put a bow on it.

2009 was my Rushmore

Great year everyone! Fuck Tim's favs. Here are my favs (favorites) for this year. For some I couldn't choose just one, so get over it.

BEST Movies: UP, Where the Wild Things Are, Fantastic Mr. Fox, District 9

BEST Albums: Sunset Rubdown - Dragonslayer, Mew - No More Stories...


BEST Video Games: New Super Mario Wii, Left 4 Dead 2

BEST Blog: Videogum

BEST Live Show: Mew at Webster Hall

BEST Ray: Blu-Ray

BEST Tears: During the first 11 minutes of UP

BEST Pants Shitting Moment: SL mentioned on The Tonight Show?

BEST Drug: Heady Boomers


Have a Happy New Year and we'll see you in TWENTY TEN! It's the future, you know.

Monday, December 28, 2009

Tim's top favorite things this year

Want to know my top favorite things in 2009? Read on, chump!

Best song: Dawn of the Dead - Does it Offend You, Yeah?

Best album: Discovery - LP

Best movie: Fantastic Mr. Fox

Best DVD: La Collectionneuse - Eric Rohmer

Best commercial: Trident Layers

Best novel: All the Pretty Horses - Cormac McCarthy

Best comic: Bodyworld - Dash Shaw

Best short story: The Youngboy (Tom Moody)

Best artist: James Castle

Best twitter: Chelsea Peretti

Best web video: Colgate Wisp by Black20

Best website: Tom Moody Blog

Best video game: Super Mario Wii

Best TV show: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Best bar: Turkey's Nest (Williamsburg)

*These aren't Serious Lunch's favorite things, just my favorite things y'all

Thursday, December 17, 2009

The New Hotness For The Holidays

Tim played this for me two weeks ago. Since then it has (deservedly) become the new hotness.

Yeasayer - Ambling Alp

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

These Are All Made Up # 5

The night before last my dad comes downstairs to my bedroom and he's acting all somber and shit. I'm like "What's the problem, Pop?" He says "I just realized that you've probably masturbated at least once". FML

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Howard Roark

Just saw Taylor Lautner hosting SNL and it reminded me how much I crack myself up!

Click it! Click the picture to make it bigger and you can read my joke!


Friday, December 11, 2009


Monday, December 7, 2009

2 Years of Slungin'

Remember this?

Of course you don't. We don't either so no big whoop.

Today is the 2 year anniversary of 2 years! That's a long time. It's basically the lifetime achievement award of internet comedy groups. But we didn't get an award. The academy snubbed us. We'll obviously have our revenge. And it will be served in a cold dish. Because that is the best kind of dish for revenge.

This is for all those people who've helped us out through the years. Thank you for your support. We've been through a lot to get here today. All of our parents wanted us to go to law school, and play football on a scholarship. We all failed, except for Bob who is the footballingist playing lawyer we've ever met. After all football is a dish best served on a cold plate. Are you following? Keep up.

Thank you viewers. Without your snide comments, death threats (yes Catholics,
those death threats), and hatred for anything that has to do with dicks (they're funny by the way, get over it), we wouldn't be doing what we're doing today.

It's a fun thing to make movies with your friends. We're lucky to have sick minded people like you watching, so thank you.

More SERIOUS LUNCH to come in 2010 (Twenty Ten).

Saturday, December 5, 2009

Sharks With People Teeth

whoever made this wins.

via digg

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Doritos videos! Have you seen them?

I just found out you can embed these Doritos things, rather than linking to the awful Doritos splash page. Can you believe that splash page? Jeez.
So here they are, again, and I promise not to repost them 4 lyfe.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Bill Maher's Outlook Window

(click to enlarge)