Hairbraider from the forthcoming Twelve Play: Fourth Quarter by R. Kelly.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Ever get the impulse to cruise around Google Maps, fantasizing about driving through exciting places all over the globe? Each and every single day, you say? Well! Get a load of this shit you weirdo: Google Drive, a retardedly simple application that I will probably waste a lot more time with than I should.
No sound effects provided so...you know what has to be done.
Monday, July 28, 2008
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Friday, July 25, 2008
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Jesus tap dancing christ these things are good. Some beautiful person left a big bowl of these in the break room today. Salt and Pepper flavored pistachio nuts, friends: they took the pistachio nut and made it better. They don't taste any saltier than your standard issue store bought pistachios, but that little bit of pepper had my taste buds goin' all "Yeah! We doin this!"
And they're heart healthy. So as if this weren't a 'hard sell' as it is, I've now tied buying this product into your overall well being.
I hear they play baseball in China
by pitching the balls out vaginas
and using big vats
of cum as the bats.
I can't think of anything finer.
I remember back when I was twenty
my face was all pock marked and bumpy
but thanks to pro-activ
I'm much more attractive
Just a shame that my lymph nodes are lumpy
"I'm the magical king of the keggers!"
Said the crazy ass street-dwelling beggar
"And m'lady, forsooth,
is the Queen of Beirut!
So let's dine on some lion placenta!"
Monday, July 21, 2008
Thursday, July 17, 2008
Monday, July 14, 2008
And I say 'fellow' in all sincerity. Setting up a very interesting precedent, the government of Spain recently proposed a bill that would grant limited human rights to some species of ape, other than homo sapiens.
I'm all for this (chup-chupp). Is it even worth debating whether or not our evolutionary cousins display advanced intelligence, huu? While I'm not saying every member of chimpunity deserves health care and a pension (what would they spend it on, bananas? lol), I think it's reasonable, hoo, to legally protect them from being tortured in a zoo, wraf! Or poked and prodded with experimental drugs by some fiend in a lab coat. That's just being civil, in my opinion.
Party on, Spain. Make it safe for my buddy to lamp out as long as he wants. HoooH'Gra!