Thursday, February 21, 2008

I Have The Dumbest Fucking Real Estate Agent

My roomate procurred our current digs unnassisted in the summer of 2006. That's an amazing feat for a New York apartment until you realize that every property in this neighborhood is attached to a realtor. Alas; we live, we learn. It's not the wasted leg work that bothers us. It's the realization that the woman who we were required to pay about 2000 dollars to just to get this place is the dumbest human being on the face of the Earth.

Not more than an hour ago I answered the front door to find this very same agent asking to be let in.

"Is there a problem?" I ask.
"Duh, ah, is deah a vacand room on da secun floah hea?" She responds with thick Brooklyn accent. Please note I live on the second floor, and renewed my lease some time ago.

"Um, no."
"No? I Tawat it was dis one?"
"Nope."
"I guess it's da next one den?"
"I guess so."

She waddles over to the next building on the block. I slam the door behind her, incredulous.

My roommate swears he will become a realtor out of spite. I just want to beat her to death with a rock.

2 comments:

Billy said...

A measured, appropriate response to a woman doing her job.

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